Dirty dating is what happens when two adults stop being polite about what they actually want. Instead of hinting for three dates, you say it in the first conversation: what you're into, what you'd like to try, what gets you going. On a dirty dating site like LocalShags, that isn't shocking, it's expected. The women here have joined precisely because they want a man who'll be honest about his appetite and match theirs, and that's why the meets are so good.
Why Dirty Dating Took Off
Ordinary dating trains everyone to hide the most interesting thing about them. You spend weeks being nice, wondering whether she's adventurous or strictly lights-off, and only find out once you're already in bed. Dirty dating flips that round. You find out first, so you only meet the people you're compatible with.
It saves time, it saves awkwardness, and it means the first night together is the one you were both hoping for. Once people try it, they rarely go back to doing it the slow way.
Naughty Dating, Spelt Out
Naughty dating means different things to different people, which is exactly why you talk about it. For one woman it's a filthy message thread all week and a hotel bar on Friday. For another it's a fantasy she's never said out loud and wants to try with someone she'll never bump into at work. For plenty, it's simply good, uncomplicated sex with someone who's enthusiastic about it.
The trick is to ask. "What's something you've always wanted to try?" is a better opening than any line you've copied off the internet. Then listen properly. Matching what someone actually wants is the sexiest thing you can do.
A Dirty Date, From First Message To Morning
Her first message to you is a question: "What's the one thing you've never told anyone you'd like to try?" You think about it for longer than you'd admit, then you answer honestly. She replies with a single word: "Same."
Three days of messages later you know more about what she likes than you've known about some girlfriends. By the time you meet, the small talk lasts exactly as long as it takes to order. She's chosen a bar with a hotel upstairs, and she's already booked the room.
The morning after, she sends you a message before you've even got your shoes on: "Next week. My turn to pick." That's dirty dating. You skipped the guessing, so all that was left was the good part.
How To Talk Dirty Without Getting Blocked
- Start warm, then turn up the heat. Flirt first. Let the conversation earn its way to explicit.
- Ask, don't assume. Find out what she's into before you describe what you'd do.
- Save photos for when they're wanted. Swapping pictures one to one is part of the fun once you've both said yes to it.
- Remember there's a person reading. Filthy and respectful aren't opposites; the best dirty daters manage both.
For more on the messaging side, our page on talking dirty before you meet goes deeper.
Dirty Date Ideas That Beat Dinner And A Film
The best dirty dates have a bit of tension built in. A few that work well:
- The hotel bar. A little bit glamorous, and conveniently close to a lift. You both know why you've chosen it.
- The weeknight drink with a deadline. One hour, then she has to be somewhere. Nothing focuses the mind like a clock.
- The slow build. A week of messages getting steadily filthier, then a Saturday where neither of you has anything else planned.
- The dare. She tells you something she's always wanted to try. You agree to the first part over a drink and save the rest for later.
Whatever you choose, agree it in advance and stick to what you agreed. Dirty dating runs on trust, and trust is what makes people brave.
From Filthy Messages To A Dirty Date
Once the messages are flying, make a plan. A drink somewhere easy, a time that suits you both, and an understanding that either of you can call it if the spark isn't there in person. It almost always is, when you've been this honest beforehand.
Dirty dating sites live or die on whether people actually meet. That's why LocalShags shows you women who are local, not someone four hours up the motorway. To compare approaches, see how shag dating keeps things simple, or browse local women who've said they're up for it.
Dirty Dating Questions
Is dirty dating just sexting?
No. Filthy messages are part of the build-up, but the point of a dirty dating site like this one is to meet. The chat is the starter, not the meal.
What if I'm into something specific?
Say so, politely, once you've got talking. You'll be surprised how often someone's been hoping to meet a man who's into the same thing.
What if the chemistry isn't there in person?
Then you finish your drink, thank her for a good evening and go home. Nobody owes anybody anything, and handling it well keeps your reputation on the site intact.
Is dirty dating the same as naughty dating?
Pretty much. Some people prefer one word, some the other. Both mean being upfront about sex from the start.
Dirty, Discreet And Between You
Whatever you get up to stays between the two of you. That's the deal on any dirty dating site worth joining, and it's the deal here. Treat her secrets like your own and you'll find people are far more adventurous when they know they're safe.
Somewhere near you is a woman with a question she's been waiting to ask someone. Join LocalShags and be the man she asks.